Pray Always

In the last 60 days I have learned much about prayer.

From September 30, 2018 “This week dad almost fell on the stairs and it was a very painful realization that I am not big enough to do this alone. Went to the temple on Saturday and was reminded that the whole plan of happiness is based on the foreknowledge of God that I am not big enough. He always knew!! I have lived in a bubble where I was big enough to fake it most of the time but this accident has been a rude awakening that I never have been big enough the Lord has always been making up the difference 

I don’t have to do it alone. And neither do you!”

One of the only things I could pray in my desperation was “Please help”. I was so beyond any mortal language my need was beyond anything I had ever experienced before and so great I couldn’t even berabalize it. Please help meant everything I had no ability to identify

From Prayer is the souls sincere desire Hymn 145
Verse 2
Prayer is the burden of a sigh,
The falling of a tear,
The upward glancing of an eye
When none but God is near.

I loved this idea that prayer is so much more than words. We pray in all ways we ask for help. Our tears are a prayer. God hears so much more than just our words

At first I thought my prayer “please help” was some how inferior to the more eloquent and specific questions and verbal prayers. My sincerity and my need were so beyond any former prayers. My humility that God in his infinite wisdom and concern for me knew better than I what I truly need. As I thought about this new place of prayer I realized that maybe my “please help”  is the best prayer I have ever offered

I loved this verse for I learned so much about prayer through these two words “please help”
Verse 8
O thou by whom we come to God,
The Life, the Truth, the Way!
The path of prayer thyself hast trod;
Lord, teach us how to pray.

I know that this scripture is true
Alma 33: 8 Yea, thou art merciful unto thy children when they cry unto thee, to be heard of thee and not of men, and thou wilt hear them.

No matter my ability to verbalize, He hears and answers

Let the Holy Spirit Guide

I taught RS Sunday (my favorite calling) and loved the lesson it was on His Spirit to Be with You By President Henry B. Eyring

My favorite quote was “ I know those things by the only way any of us can know them. The Holy Ghost has spoken to my mind and heart that they are true--not just once but often. “

I know the Book of Mormon is true because the Holy Ghost has spoken to my heart that it is true.

I have thought often about the amazing blessing and gift that is the testimony and conversion that only comes from the Spirit.

I love the song "Let the Holy Spirit Guide" Hymn number 143

Meddlesomeness and Mottos

Our watchword should be “Never stop growing and serving.” Camilla Kimball

So my mother in law has told me for many years that she is still a teenager in a old lady body. This has been a funny thing to me when I was a teenager assuming that her and I were so different. That the years are magic and make you into something totally different. She was wise and smart and knew all the right answers. She was solid and so sure of the choices she had made and was successful in all the ways I hoped to be.

Well now I am older than the age of my sweet mother in law when she first introduced me to this idea. And I have to admit as always she was absolutely right. Age has done so much the opposite of the surety and solidness I thought would magically be gained. I spend many of my prayers just telling the Lord how much I don't know. How much I don't understand. The problems of the word have become more real in my age, I have enough experience to know that the ideals and perfect hopes of my younger days do not always (usually) happen in the way I thought they would and that my expectations often just lead to disappointment and lack of gratitude for what is.

This new experience of having my children need me less and my hands and heart less full as my younger days has led to some soul searching and new purpose seeking. 

A dear friend sent me this amazing talk from Camilla Kimball with this perfect quote to describe my experience "When a mother’s children are reared, or if she is childless, the years after forty or fifty may begin to look bleak. Her real life’s work may seem done, when in reality it has only changed. The active woman cannot hold her hands, so she looks about for something to take up her leisure time. What should it be? Charity? General meddlesomeness? Shall she become a burden or shall she embark upon a new adventure? Happy the woman who has the foresight to see that through forty years of experience, she has matured the ability to commence a grand and useful second half of her life."

This is Camilla's advice to me at this stage of my life "In addition, there are many opportunities for service to others. The world is full of lonely, troubled people who need a helping hand, who need a listening ear or a friendly visit or a comforting letter. Our watchword should be “Never stop growing and serving.”

Lasting love and hugs from your Mom

A Lasting Hug from your Mama Wendy

My love for quilting started as a young woman. I had an amazing beehive leader who made it one of her goals to teach 12-13 year olds homemaking skills. She helped me make my first and several other quilts including one for Angie’s wedding in 1993, long after I was not her beehive anymore

My second experience was for my wedding. Grandma Rebecca made us several quilts. My favorite was a light blue that she had hand quilted. Something about cuddling up with her blanket as I was a newly married bride just learning to be a wife comforted and blessed me with strength and renewed dedication to be strong like Grandma Rebecca. It made me think of my blessings of having a husband and her valiant example of motherhood alone after the death of her husband. The gift of a quilt is so symbolic of warmth, comfort and wrapping your self in a quilt handmade by someone who loves you feels like a big hug just when you need it

Grandma Rebecca’s quilts comforted and surrounded each of my babies. One in particular was given to Joseph for his baby blessing and lived to celebrate the name and blessing of all eight of my children. It lives today to bless Grandma Rebecca’s great grand babies

So beyond the idea of comfort, protection, and warmth. I think having a homemade quilt has historically been a way for mothers to bless their children and families. Quilting has symbols and meaning behind the patterns as well as artistic and creative outlet for the women of the past. 

Quilting bee's were our method of gathering and women's connection and advice seeking. Around the quilts of the past we discussed and learned from those older than us wisdom was passed from mother to daughter.

Fathers are able to give Priesthood blessings to their children. But I feel like a quilt is the mother equivalent, nurturing, protection,and love are all bound together in the threads of the fabric and the creativity and hand work is a symbol of the love and never ending work that your mother puts into your whole life.

Definition of Happiness

"The term happiness in the gospel sense embodies a mix of spiritual attributes that defies precise description. Attempts to identify the elements of happiness commonly allude to such qualities of being as love, joy, peace, bliss, contentment, and enlightenment. For present purposes, suffice it to say that true happiness is that profound sense of spiritual well-being that is the product of living our lives in harmony with our core values, as informed and shaped by our devotion to and desire to please God." Bridling Mammon: Harnessing the Power of Money in the Service of Virtue STANLEY D. NEELEMAN June 11, 2002 • Devotional

Christmas Thoughts

Had to work today, 12/24/2017, but got permission to come home at Lunch and see Sam sing in church. I was so grateful. I love the music of Christmas and the messages and praise that we sing.

Sam sang a beautiful song I had never heard before and it is so lovely.

Gratitude

I was challenged to make a list of 25 things I am grateful for:

1. My family-

I have noticed more lately how blessed I really am to have such a large family and people who I have always been able to count on through thick and thin. I am so grateful for the blessing of marriage and the solid foundation that it has provided our family to weather the hardships together. I am grateful for the Temple and the promised blessing of being together with my family forever.

There was a day I had worked all day and came home to a mess. The house was a disaster. One moment that really seemed symbolic to me was a lovely vinyl decoration sign that read "Family's are Forever" upside down at the bottom of the stairs in a pile of dirty laundry and garbage. It was supposed to be on the fireplace mantel being all decorative and awesomely proclaiming the solidarity of our family. But somehow in the rough housing or other nonsense of the day it had ended up off the mantel in the pile at the bottom of the stairs. Somehow this seemed like the true meaning of the message "family's are forever." Whether we can be displayed in public or not. Maybe sometimes we are more "magazine ready" then others. But forever doesn't have to mean perfect, it means forever and through the atonement of Christ all that is broken can be repaired, all that is sick can be healed, and all that is dirty can be cleaned. Forever means just that!

2. Health-

I love my body. It has done amazing and even miraculous things. As a pediatric nurse for the last 20 years I have seen that having 8 healthy children with no complications is truly a miracle.

I am trying to get back in the morning habit of exercising each day and love the feeling of having a stronger leaner body that can run up the stairs without being winded.

Some experiences this year has made me glad I don't need healthcare but have been grateful for the wonderful resources we have in this area for those who have needed it. Miracles have been accomplished by medical professionals and my mom was healed of something that would have killed her in the next few years.

3. Warmth-

I was so grateful this week as the weather turned really cold for a warm house and lots of blankets. I loved snuggling up with my fireplace and blankets and watching a movie with my family. I loved curling up in my warm feather comforter after the long work day. Oh and I almost forgot my favorite new luxury-- Fuzzy socks. I love fuzzy socks when it is cold!!

4. Rich yummy food and plenty of it-

Been surrounded by yummy food for the holidays. I have been trying to be more mindful and enjoy each thing rather than just stuff myself until I am sick.

5. Honorable children who bring me great joy

I have been so blessed this year to see so many of my children adult so well!! I am so grateful for the men and women they are becoming and the valiant way they are tackling the challenges and success of life. I am loving the addition of our first daughter in law and the joy that having more women around has brought. I have loved the strengths of the two women my sons have chosen to be with and the growth they have encouraged and influenced in my sons. I have loved having them call me to check in and let me know what is going on with them and love watching their successes from afar.

6. Fall

I have loved the long fall we were able to have this year and the wonderful changing of the leaves and warmth to enjoy mild weather until December. It was wonderful not to have snow early and enjoy both Halloween and Thanksgiving with dry ground.

7. Work

I love my work. I love the ability to bless those in need and love working with families and children. I love helping others get well and go home.

8. Holidays that give us an excuse to gather together.

This year I tried something new. I read a great book "For the Love" by Jen Hatmaker and in it she talks about sweet and spicy families. This was such a revelation to me and gave me hope. We are certainly in the spicy family side of things and that can mean for some loud, obnoxious, family gatherings. Most years I have tried to control everyone and stop any conversation or comment that I deem "too spicy". But this year I decided our family is like the ocean and I can either ride the waves or fight and drown in them.

Peace was found in letting everyone be themselves and say what they had to say no matter how it bothered me. I decided their behavior didn't reflect on my mothering but on their own decisions and behavior and I could just enjoy the good and ignore the bad.

9. Nap time!

Oh how I love a good nap!

10. Good friends

I have been so blessed in my life to have true and good friends. I can seek their counsel and advice and count on them to give it to me straight but kind!

11. Education

So grateful for parents, teachers, and employers who encouraged me to do well in school and pursue my goals to become a nurse. I am so grateful to work in a field where I see miracles and healing daily. Grateful to be able to work 4 days a week and still get full time hours.

12. Photographs and memories

Loving the photographs and memories of our family when we were younger as well as the photographs we have been finding of our ancestors. Nothing helps you feel connected to someone more than a photograph from their life. Loving recording memories and especially recipes from our family.

13. Love the Temple and my Temple buddy Lisa!!

I need to be in the Temple weekly if possible. I get out of sorts and just darn grumpy when I haven't been able to get that connection and peace. After a few weeks of not going I can feel a weight come off my shoulders as I enter the house of the Lord and know that I am filled with greater power and endurance than I could ever have on my own.

14. I love our neighborhood

We have the best neighbors ever! We are so blessed with people around us who are so generous and giving.

15. I love teaching Relief Society

I was recently put in as a RS teacher and I am loving being part of the adults again. I miss my girls and the fun they made me have :) But I am also really enjoying being with dear friends and making new friends with the women again. What a blessing it is to be surrounded by loving Christ like angels.

16. Love my man!

26 years and I love him more now than ever! He is so good to me. First snow fall and he was out scraping my car and shoveling the walk and driveway before work!! Love that guy!

17. Love having a 9 year old at Christmas

I am so grateful to have the magic of Christmas one more year in my home. He is just on the edge of losing the magic and I can see it coming. But this year he is all about it. He has loved the Light the world calendar and advent calendar idea. Each day he is so excited to fulfill his challenge and get the chocolate out of the Advent calendar. Oh to be a child again!!

18. Love having a missionary.

We have been so blessed for 4 years now to have a full time missionary serving. It has been such a blessing to see them serve others and give so much of themselves.

Elder Paul Roberts

Elder Matt Roberts

Elder Adam Roberts

19. Love CoQ10

So this is weird. At Costco the other day there was a sample table of CoQ10 and I got talked into buying it by the salesman. But it is awesome!! I feel so much better after work when I drink 2 tablespoons. More energy and feel stronger. Who knew??

20. Love Christmas music

I think Christmas music is the greatest ever. My son has been playing the saxophone for 2 years now and has me hooked on Jazz Christmas music. It is great!! Always loved Vince Giraldi  and Peanuts Jazz but there is lots on Pandora to listen to.

21. Love nuts

Sunflower seeds, pistachios, almonds, pumpkin seeds..... Yum and they don't make me crash as a snack.

22. Love Twisted Peppermint lotion

23. Love maxi skirts

24. Love boots

25. Grateful for the Savior of the world

Thinking about all the names of the Savior at this Christmas time and one that I heard recently was "Great and cherished hope". Thinking about the blessing of hope in my life.

Merry Christmas to all!!